The not-so-fun bit of living near a private school is the swathe of shiny, black, massively sized Tonka cars that I have the joy of having to avoid as they drive like idiots. Today I had another near-miss with one of them as they decided to drive across the road in front of me, not even aware of my existence, my right of way or whether they even possessed a set of indicators or not.

Well, for once, I’m going to say nothing more on the subject. However, I will quote from Marcus Brigstocke, who was talking about 4×4/SUV drivers. I’ll let you decide whether I agree with him or not (bear in mind that I once said that anyone who buys a Subura Imprezza should immediately have their licence revoked because, let’s be honest, you’re going to drive it like a git anyway).

“Screw you, you selfish, ignorant, retarded, gas-guzzling, child-killing, planet-wrecking, status-obsessed, tractor-driving, prick-like, Chris de Burgh-listening, wingy, backward, bull bar-bearing bastard. Shut your petrol-filled mouth, think about someone other than yourself, get a better car, learn to drive and stop being dicks. There we go. Good to get that off my chest.
“I need it for the children” SHUT UP! “It’s the only safe way I can..” no, SHUT UP! “I can drive when I want, this is political correctness gone mad” no, SHUT UP! You’ve not got a leg to stand on, so stay seated and don’t speak.”


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